Thursday, April 14, 2011

Listening Ears

About a month ago Sebastian had been in trouble at school for not listening to his teacher.  As a result he had to sit separately from his friends and was told that if this behaviour continued he would miss out on activity time.

Since that time I have made a point of "securing" Sebastian's listening ears as part of our good-bye routine in the morning before the kindergarten gate.  Well today when I went to pick him up his teacher took me aside and told me that Sebastian didn't have a great day as he was throwing things around and when she took him aside and asked him if he had forgotten to put his listening ears on today he replied, "No.  I have them.  They just came unscrewed."   She said it took every ounce of her willpower not to burst out laughing at his response.

Once in the car without being prompted he told me all about how his listening ears came unscrewed and how as a result he didn't listen very well, instructing me that next Tuesday I better make sure I put them on better!


If he can come up with such quick excuses now I think we may be in trouble!!


Addendum:
Later in the evening while lying in bed Sebastian told me that he was going to put a piece of tape on the table at school and then start colouring on it.  When one of the kids tells the teacher that he is drawing on the desk he'll say he wasn't as he was really only colouring on a piece of tape.  I suggested that he let his teacher know of this master plan and he said no as he wants to see what she'll do when she realizes she's been tricked.  Oy!  Thinking I may need to write a little note to the teacher letting her know what this kid has in the works!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

If you could be a colour

I asked Sebastian what colour he would be if he could be a colour and this was his  response:

"I'd be black because black would be water and then I could swim better.  Actually I would be every colour because that would be my favourite colour if we mixed  all of the colours together and made one huge rainbow that would be my colour - the rainbow!"

Monday, April 11, 2011

"Pardon our mess, child development in process"

I just took this quiz called What's Your Mothering Personality and thought I'd publish my results for Sebastian so that one day he can let me know whether or not he agrees with the results....
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Mother and Child by George P Hatsatouris

"Inside our children, I believe, is a truth that tells them what's best for them. I am always listening for that truth."
 
INFP – The "Tuned In" Mother
(Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceiving)
 
Aware, astute, and understanding, the INFP mother is sensitive to her child's needs, feelings, and perceptions. By observing and listening to the cues of the whole child, she is "tuned in" and naturally develops an intuitive feel for what he or she needs. Responsive and helpful as well, she tends patiently to those needs as they arise.

The INFP mother is comfortable letting her children follow their own course of development and make their own choices. She offers encouragement and uses her insights to head off trouble and difficult issues.

The INFP mother takes vicarious pleasure giving her children good experiences and watching them enjoy childhood. She's happiest creating pleasant, memorable times for the whole family.

Strengths
  • Cultivating a one-on-one relationship with each child. Accepting and gentle, the INFP mother places a high value on having a close relationship with each child. In cultivating that relationship, she readily makes time available for each child one-on-one.
  • Interacting with her children. The INFP mother spends time playing with her children side by side when they are young-making yarn dolls or clay figures, playing catch, or reading books together. As they get older, she finds other ways to engage them and interact with them.
  • "Tuning in" to feelings. The INFP mother pays especially close attention to her children's feelings, really listening, trying to understand, and finding appropriate ways to respond. She is also comfortable sharing her own feelings with her children, inviting them to listen and understand her feelings as well as their own.
  • Building happy childhood memories. The INFP mother is dedicated to creating good times for her children, making sure they experience a wide variety of fun activities traditionally associated with a happy childhood: picnics, pets, Winnie the Pooh, Girl Scouts, a day at the beach, fireflies, ice cream cones… opportunities that will soon pass and never come again.
Struggles
  • Focus. "Tuned in" to feelings and responsive to everyone's viewpoint, the INFP mother may feel overwhelmed if everyone is needing something from her at the same time or when different points of view are being expressed. To whom should she listen? And whom should she "tune out"?
  • Decision making. The INFP mother works hard at sorting through various options to decide what's right for her children, and she tends to deal with each situation as it arises. At the time, she may feel disadvantaged by her ability to see all sides and may wonder if she is doing the right thing. Her reluctance to formulate black-and-white "rules" and policy statements for her children can leave her feeling permissive and guilty.
  • Societal expectations. The INFP mother struggles to balance society's expectations for order, organization, and schedules with her need (and desire) to turn to a child's need of the moment. Keeping a household running may seem at odds with the job of raising children. Her motto may be, "Pardon our mess, child development in process."

Tips
  • Rather than constantly doing, the INFP mother may function at her best when she has large blocks of unstructured time—time to deal with the unexpected, time to pursue creative projects, and time to think things through. Always giving to others, she can benefit from giving to herself as well—time to take an afternoon nap, read, walk, bike, or watch a movie or play.
  • Naturally tuned in to what others think and feel, the INFP mother needs to practice tuning in to her own wisdom (and trusting it!) when making decisions on behalf of her children. Because the INFP often represents a minority point of view, she may have learned to discount her own intuition about her child when facing a teacher, physician, or administrator. The INFP mother can empower herself as a parent by confidently acting on her tuned-in understanding of her child, even when others don't see it her way… and by giving herself room to make mistakes and learn from them.